0
You Know You're Addicted to Coding When...
• Triple espresso's start tasting bland
• Instead of using MS Word, you type your essay for school in HTML using NotePad.
• School? What's that?
• You laugh at movies that show programmers at work.
• You walk outside and wonder why the sun doesn't make a lens-flare in your eye....
• You get withdrawal symptoms if you're away from a computer for more than 3 hours
• (Lines_of_Code) / (Hours_of_Sleep) < (Number_of_Energy_Drinks_Consumed)
• You're pressing CTRL+S every 5 minutes, in every application..
• You end each line you type with ";", even plain english ones;
• Whenever somebody asks you to do something, you try to think of a way to write a program that would
help you.
• You have 2 bookshelves filled with programming books in your room... because the 5 shelves in the living room are full.
• You know the following sequence by heart: 1 2 4 8 16 32 64 128 256 512 1024 2048 4096 8192 16384 32768 65536 131072
• You need an intercom for downstairs to tell your parents / girlfriend / wife / whatever to get you more JOLT.
• When you take a break from programming, and program.
• When you can say with a great level of confidence that you have written more lines of code than english.
• You wake up in the middle of the night with the solution to your coding problem.
• Your 4 year old son has seen you login and out of Windows and Linux so much that he can do it himself.
• You have more groceries inside your keyboard than in your fridge.
• You have a toothbrush next to your monitor.
• You watch a tv sitcom and think "I could write an algorithm that writes the scripts for these things"
• You sit stuck at traffic lights and work out a more efficient algorithm for them, based on road orientation, sensor placement, time of year, time of day, weather and local sporting events, in your head.
• The people you respect most you have never physically seen or spoken to, but you always bow to their knowledge.
• You consider 'drinking caffeine' and 'sleeping' to be synonyms.
• You get drunk\high\otherwise intoxicated just for a different coding experience.
• You think of sex as an algorithm.
• Sunshine genuinely hurts your eyes.
• You actually feel like crap from getting 8 hours of sleep, that just so unnatural
• You can't help but squeeze math and research topics in while sweet-talking to a girl.
• You have a "hacker's manicure" (i.e. huge calluses on all your fingers)
• When you die you want "Hello world" carved into your headstone
• You keep old computers around and boot them up every once in awhile for the nostalgia.
• You look at your old code and cringe
• You got a D in Computer Programming class because you where coding a plasma effect instead of a "Hello World!" program
• When someone asks you your favorite color, you give the hexicode value.
• No one else can ever use your computer, as it is tweaked so much only you know how to use it.
• The first time you use another person's computer it takes you less than 30 seconds to completely disable all useless programs from running at boot and uninstalling all the ad-ware the fools had on the system.
• You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends who are addicted to coding.
