51 replies to this topic

[Clandestine]

Alright so I just heard about something that happend at my moms house the other day.... My little brother (15) I guess hit my little sister (16) and then my mom hit him. And then he started to choke my mom and then went into the kitchen and pulled a knife on her saying that hes going to ****ing kill her.

This is just the info that I got from my brother. I havnt talked to my mom yet and got all the facts. Im try to contact her. I live all the way in AZ and they live in CA I wont be able to go over there until friday.

I dont know what to do with him. I cant kick his *** cuase I can go to jail, but my dad said that me and my two other brothers (23 and 25) should scare him straight. By like pining him against the wall or floor..

Just hes soo young only 15 and already starting to **** up his life....
this is pretty hard atm...

alright that is all

-Devyn

[Mr. Matt]

he can still do you for pinning him against the floor or somthing

report him to cops and get him a criminal record, should scare him straight.

[coolaid]

its the (your) parents fault... i dont wanna be mean but its true, any mom that disciplined there kids would never be in a situation of being threatened by their 15 year old.

its too late for you mom to do discipline if he's already pulling a knife at her , but i guess you can smack some sense into him, literally, smack it into him. he aint gonna call the cops. just disconnect the phones and lock him in! serious action takes serious consequences.

thats the problem with todays youngsters, they've never gotten a good beatin.

[Matthew.]

Go to the cops, get a warning put on him. Thats a 10 year mark on his record which will obviously be seen when he applies for work etc.

If your going to do what i would do, go and kick his ass in, sorry but i dont believe in bloody warnings etc especially if he took a knife to your mom, and stranger doing that to anyone i know would have to deal with me, i would **** ing kill anyone who took a knife to my own mum. I've unfortunately been known to do a lot more over a lot less. (i dont try to make a habit of it but never let anyone push you over (- mentally or physically. )

Anywho.....

Get a warning from the cops, it that doesn't work, do the brotherly thing and kick him straight as your dad said (i get the feeling your dad and me would get along lol).

Give him a bloody good shouting at as well

But seriously, taking a knife to anyone is very serious so don't let it slip. I'm actually pissed at someone i don't know now....

Edited by .Matt, 13 June 2006 - 05:48 PM.

[Dirk Black]

If I were you I wouldnt yell at him, I wouldnt hit him, I wouldnt beat him up shove him down pin him on the floor etc.
That is exactly why he is behaving the way he is. Thats not how you raise a child. A child - it doesnt matter if he is 15 or 5 or 1 or 17 is just trying to be. Thats it, he doesnt want to be controled. What you need to do is talk to him man to man, figure out why he is acting like this and try to help, beating him and yelling at him is only going to make him end up in a mental institution and on drugs that will make him even more genocydal and suicidal.. Just talk to him.
I wish you the best of luck. I hope your brother will be ok.

[coolaid]

If I were you I wouldnt yell at him, I wouldnt hit him, I wouldnt beat him up shove him down pin him on the floor etc.
That is exactly why he is behaving the way he is. Thats not how you raise a child. A child - it doesnt matter if he is 15 or 5 or 1 or 17 is just trying to be. Thats it, he doesnt want to be controled. What you need to do is talk to him man to man, figure out why he is acting like this and try to help, beating him and yelling at him is only going to make him end up in a mental institution and on drugs that will make him even more genocydal and suicidal.. Just talk to him.
I wish you the best of luck. I hope your brother will be ok.

hmm... time outs dont solve anything, neither do talks. everybody i know was made to hurt when they did something wrong, and how many grew up unstable? none...

a child doesn't want to be controlled, nobody does, but being controlled is the only way to stop outbursts like what clandestine just pointed out. it was the end result of being uncontrolled, not controlled.

[Matthew.]

Hmm, something just popped into my head and its not clear to me from your message.

Is this a one-off thing? Or has he done this before (or something similar - you know.)

[Donna]

So something must of provoked him to get that angry, a normal person would not just pull a knife with no reason. There is always a reason behind things and if what your writing is true then your mother should of called the Police and had him charged and given to the childrens services or whatever they do in your country.

15 too young? I don't think so if he's old enough to threaten someones life then he's old enough to be locked up as the next time his threats could be a reality.

Threatening him won't make him an angel it will teach him to threaten others, he could need professional counselling and maybe medication to control anger outbursts etc

[ktd]

*sigh*

You could be in for it man. Domestic stuff can be a real mess and lots of times I was called in to stop the fights. I can't really tell you what to do because it really comes to what you're family is like. However I could tell you what some people do to stop this.

One things is to just turn the person in. Since he is under 18 he may not be put into a detention center and may get a mistamener but I bet he will get arrested because he was armed and he a knife up to her.


You could ask the police to give him a warning but then he may get mad at you and come after you or worse.

It's hard to say what to do but just try to keep things calm between everyone. Just make sure it doesn't get to the point where I come in because that's trouble then.

Edit: Also listen to what Donna said. Donna could be right too. He may need medical assistence

Edited by kevthedude, 13 June 2006 - 08:25 PM.

[Faken]

Time to call the cops now before he kills someone, then seek a psych help and see what's going on.

Dan

[c-c-C-C-UNIT]

15 too young? I don't think so if he's old enough to threaten someones life then he's old enough to be locked up as the next time his threats could be a reality.

Yeah, cause putting him in prison wouldn't have seriously negative effects on his mental well being. What he needs is some good ol' fashion shrink.

[syntex]

I sugest u do try to find out whats really going on
Maybe problems at school,
I mean ive pulled knives on people before (not a pretty sight)
But yeah try to find out first.. THEN try to fix it

[Clandestine]

Alright I talked to him today, and i kind of blame my mom. So this is what happend

They were playing a game Animal crossing (Lol.....) and my sister said something and then he punched her in her arm. Then she started to cry and then my mom went in there and started pushing him and punched his arms like 5 times (this makes my mom sound very violent she really isnt though it must be something in the water they are drinking in there house) and my little bro told her to back off, and she wouldnt so he threatend her.

Ok i know it is still wrong for you to threaten someone with a weapon. But we all been to the point were we have gotten so angry that we didnt care what we did. So i think my lil bro had that happen to him.

Also after everything was said and done. Later on that day i guess, my bro apologized to my mom and she said accepted it he just has to follow her rules.

-Devyn

Edited by Clandestine, 13 June 2006 - 11:53 PM.

[Clandestine]

Hmm, something just popped into my head and its not clear to me from your message.

Is this a one-off thing? Or has he done this before (or something similar - you know.)

First time, like i said in the post above I think it was just one of those getting really pissed, like we all been before and say/do things that we really dont mean.

-Devyn

eeeeepp sorry for the double post didnt notice... Sorry its late just got off work, kinda ttired sorry again

Edited by Clandestine, 13 June 2006 - 11:56 PM.

[MK_LAGI]

Since I was born (17 now) my father only hit me once and I remember it like it was yesterday. Since then, I listened to him, not saying hitting works but, I think disciplining at a young age is important.

Mukhtar

[Jem]

If I were you I wouldnt yell at him, I wouldnt hit him, I wouldnt beat him up shove him down pin him on the floor etc.
That is exactly why he is behaving the way he is. Thats not how you raise a child. A child - it doesnt matter if he is 15 or 5 or 1 or 17 is just trying to be. Thats it, he doesnt want to be controled. What you need to do is talk to him man to man, figure out why he is acting like this and try to help

That's the best advice I've seen so far.

How exactly do you control violence with violence and then expect the kid not to turn around and say "hang on a minute!". I was slapped as a kid, and while it didn't do any lasting damage to me, it just made me wonder where my mum gets off on being a hypocrite. It didn't solve anything.

At the end of the day, first time it has happened/provoked or not, you don't pull a knife on your own family. He's got anger management problems and he needs to talk about them to somebody.

[Snoug]

Faken is right again. notify police as soon as possible and check into some treatment centers.

Just make sure the quality treatment centres and not those family centers you see on the side of the road. They Do more harm then good. Because the staff just don't know what there doing.



Oh and adding now that i read the outcome... I still do believe there needs to be counselling for both the child and parent in this situation. Because its obvious that they both have anger and maturity issues.

Edited by Snoug, 14 June 2006 - 09:06 AM.

[Faken]

Funny, I got the beats when I was a kid... my father was a very tough disciplinarian (he was a cop) and I got the 3" belt across the butt very frequently and some face slaps, but I never pulled a knife on anyone or became violent. Not saying I he was right in his methods, but there's DEFINITELY a lack of discipline among kids these days and most young folks have virtually no consequence for their actions. Parents are too busy trying to be their kids' best friend instead of their parents.

To say that your parents were hypocrites for hitting you isn't exactly valid... You were getting disciplined as a consequence of your actions in a form of physical punishment. You were paying for your misconduct... most kids that got a spanking didn't just do so because you beat up a kid or something. You got mouthy, did something stupid etc...

Look at how these kids are keeping weapons (sometimes guns and small explosives) in their rooms and parents are oblivious. Wtf?! I once found a lighter on the ground and put it in my pocket on my way home from school.. within 2 hours of getting home my father busted me with it and I got the major interrogation lol! Now kids can build bombs on their night tables with no one the wise.

Dan

[MK_LAGI]

Hey, how many of you guys would actually hit your kids to get them disciplined, if you ever have any?